Beloved Shepherd, November 23, 2003
by Reverend Christian Swinger
V.O.: All rise!
Hello brethren and sistren of Creation. I come to you today to speak humbly
of the Lord. As you may know, I am His servant and through the reading of
His Word, the Bible, I connect real life people with spiritual wonders. In
short, I'm one of many small portals into the ways of the Lord our God.
What I want to talk to you today is something overlooked, in fact, it amazed
me when I thought of this because I ignored it for years. I overlooked it
and then, feeling no adverse reaction, considered overlooking it the right
course of action and so I kept on doing it. But some days ago, while I was
warm, naked and wet in my bathroom, it occurred to me: this truth is so
simple I must bring it to the Lord's children.
Brethren, by our Lord, I speak to you of many fundamental truths, but this
one is no less important, although from its simple appearance you might deem
it so. The truth is this, however: God is brown. No matter how we analyze
the scriptures, with mathematics or occultism or psychology, we can find no
single mention of this truth, because it is one of the truths too sacred to
write in any one place.
Instead, you will find that the whole of the Bible supports this truth. An
allusion here, a tangent there, some incidental mention, and only if you
read all of them do you realize that in the middle of all these references
is a giant and important piece of information. God is brown. I want you to
pass this on to your brothers and sisters for me now.
Let us pray.
V.O.: The Reverend Christian Swinger has left the building.
--
Put down the Bacon lovetoy, because I'm
reddy fur luv!
|
|