I was just wondering about something.
Did any of you happen to catch last night's extra extra special deluxe
lost episode? It is bound to be a new holiday classic that will be
watched all over the world.
The news was not good for Mike. Mr. Phillips informed him that
Christmas bonus checks would not be given this year. It seems the
project Mike had been working on for the National Gay (Homosexual)
Bathhouse Society of America had been slow to be accepted. The society
had previewed Mike's plan for a new gay (homosexual) bathhouse, and
decided they needed way more glory holes and rim chairs in the saunas.
Their payment would not be made until after the holidays. Mike
explained to Mr. Phillips he needed the money to buy presents for the
children. Mr. Phillips said he was sympathetic, but his hands were
tied. He invited Mike to check out the glory holes and rim chairs in
the company's private bathrooms. Mike was more than willing to check
them out.
Mike's rectum was very sore on the drive home. He was in quite a
quandary. He so desperately wanted to buy presents for the children,
and was heart broken there was no money to do so. Mike decided the
only way around this was to kill one of the children, so there would be
more money.
Mike gathers the children, Carol and Alice in the family room, and
talks about the grave situation (no pun intended). He explains that
one of the children must die, but he hadn't made up his mind as to who.
The children ask why they can't just fire Alice. Mike explains that
Carol works very very hard at doing nothing, and couldn't do nothing
with Alice's being there. He also notes they need Alice's pubic hair
because he can not afford to buy expensive brillo pads.
The children beg and plead with Mike to change his mind. Mike ask them
for alternatives. How would he still afford to buy presents with so
many children. The children begin to think about what to do. Hours
pass. They are empty handed of ideas.
All of the sudden, Jan shrikes "I've got it! I've got it!" "How
about, rather than giving presents this year, we give BM's (bowel
movements)?" She said. "Homemade BM's (bowel movements)."
The children all jumped for joy. "That's a WONDERFUL idea, Jan!" Said
Greg. "Everyone want's BM's (bowel movements)."
"Alice!" Yelled Mike. "Fire up the fiber and taco casserole...we're
gonna make us some BM's (bowel movements!)."
The next month the children worked and worked making tons of BM's
(bowel movements). The boys would pack them in festive buckets with
urine, and the girls would squirt their menses (period)(female juice)
all over the BM (bowel movement).
Christmas morning came, and the Brady's were so excited to open their
presents. Carol went first. She picked up a package. "Oh!" said
Carol. "I can't IMAGINE what THIS might be!" She acted very
surprised. Cindy spoke up "It's something VERY special mommie!" Carol
shook the package. She opened and her face lit up "OH WOW! Cindy,
it's the most beautiful BM (bowel movement) I've ever seen in my life.
I can't wait to try it on!"
The Brady's continued to open the packages. Some of the BM's (bowel
movements) had sperm on them, some had menses (period)(female juice),
some were packed in urine, some were covered in a special,
complimentary colored diareaah. And, some were just plain.
The boys took their BM's (bowel movements) out on the lawn and started
playing BM (bowel movement) ball. The girls put their BM's (bowel
movements) in their hair. Mike munched out on some of the special BM's
(bowel movements) made for him. Alice used some of her BM's (bowel
movements) to prop up her sagging, floppy breast.
In the last scene, the family all gathers on the astroturf as Carol
begins to sing a passionate version of "How Great Tho Are" to the BM
(bowel movement) that Peter gave her.
Just then, Mr. Phillips drives up. He tells Mike how sorry he was
about the bonus checks, and it was time to make it up. Mike said "Mr.
Phillips, we don't need your money. We have all the presents we need.
God has provided us with these beautiful BM's (bowel movements)."
Mr. Phillips then offers Mike the best BJ (blow job) in the world. In
the last scene, you see Mike and Mr. Phillips walking hand-in-hand
towards Mike and Carol's bedroom. "Want to watch?" Mike ask the
children. All gravitate to the bedroom, singing "Silent Night!"
It was the best Christmas episode I've ever seen. I hope it will be
repeated!
Love,
Saggie
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