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From: "Niels" <Elvis_Niels@hotmail.com>
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Subject: Re: it is now
Date: Thu, 12 Feb 2004 08:47:28 +0100
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Xref: news.nzbot.com alt.teens:1043
> >> Phil Losopher:
> >> I guess the general theme here
> >> is that doing things - particularly violent things -
> >> while intensely angry
> >> can cause more problems than it solves.
> >Niels:
> >Cangartulations! You get it!
> Phil:
> Kewl ! - if i get the next question right
> do i win a washing-machine or something?
Niels:
And who do you think is going to pay that?
> >> Noah:
> >> This principle can be extended to include ALL emotions;
> >> try sharing an Ark with a claustrophobic elephant
> >> or a horny rhinoceros, and you'll see what I mean....
> >Niels:
> >Yes, but I don't think that's usually wrong with animals...
> >Its only humans being claustrophobic.
> Noah:
> lots of Humans think that,
> but giraffe parents are always telling their kids to dress warm
> or they'll get a sore throat,
> porcupines have problems with intimacy,
> centipedes are always asking if their shoes go with their outfits....
Niels:
Have you ever seen a giraffe with a coat or something on?
> >> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >> >... certain computers have
> >> >> >> >advantages other than the others.
> >> >> klaatu:
> >> >> according to legend, a computer-tech got a customer
> >> >> who couldn't figure out where to put in a CD,
> >> >> and also complained his computer's cup-holder
> >> >> was too flimsy to hold a full cup of coffee;
> >> >> turned out he was using the CD-slide to hold his cup.
> >> >Niels:
> >> >That's really a bad thing to do!
> >> Techie:
> >> Well, it's an ill wind that blows nobody good -
> >> I could get rich doing repairs !
> >Niels:
> >And I could get rich asking 50 cents
> >doing repairs for the local Schoolpaper.
> Ed Itor:
> how does one repair newspaper?
Niels:
Nonono you stupid idiot! It's repairing the computer we use for
lay-outing... the thing's running pretty okay now though.
> >> >Niels:
> >> >... My set of boxes are much better than the one in the computer.
> >> >The one in the computer is usually only used
> >> >when making sounds in MS-DOS programmes,
> >> >the boxes you plug in, are used with (mostly) Windows programmes.
> >> klaatu:
> >> that makes sense; it's about all they're good for.
> >Niels:
> >I even sometimes use the ones that are inside the computer,
> >for DOS programmes mostly.
> Techie:
> I use mine for paperweights.
Niels:
Wauw! How did you do that then?
> >> >> >> klaatu:
> >> >> >> that's what i need - a computer-techie uncle.
> >> >> >>
> >> >> >> <checks computer-manual>:
> >> >> >> Nope - they didn't include one with the machine.
> >> >> >> dang.
> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >No, they usually aren't included with the machine,
> >> >> >it's just the advantage of having a big (or smart) family.
> >> >> klaatu:
> >> >> oh well - suppose i'm gonna hafta grow my own....
> >> >Niels:
> >> >Yes, Or marry a beautiful lady who has one.
> >> Brigham Young:
> >> or do like I did: marry 27 women
> >> and try to populate an entire State.
> >Niels:
> >That could be a possibility..
> >but then you're more busy f*cking up than making a family.
> Brigham Young:
> Hey, I needed the exercise,
> and besides I'm in training;
> we're trying to get our Sport recognized as an Olympic event.
Niels:
I don't think that would do very well.... :-S
> >> >Niels:
> >> > ... I'm having far too less fun than I want to. :'(
> >> <theme-music from "Mission Impossible fills the air>
> >> <camera pans in on mini-tape-recorder>
> >> <voice of Peter Graves intones>:
> >>
> >> "Then your mission (should you decide to accept it)
> >> is to live your life in such a manner
> >> that if you suddenly find out you're gonna die tonight
> >> you can face it without regret
> >> that you left something un-done which COULD have been done."
> >> klaatu:
> >> i got hit by a car which knocked me across an intersection.
> >> hit hard on my back.
> >> sat up just in time to see the bumper of a car
> >> (maybe the same one which hit me the first time)
> >> as it screeched into me, brakes locked.
> >>
> >> ran over my right shin,hit me in the face
> >> and stopped an inch from my nuts,
> >> bouncing me off pavement like a rubber ball.
> >>
> >> decided right then i'd never again pass up an opportunity,
> >> or let anybody tell me about being too young or too small
> >> or too anything else.
> >>
> >> since then i do what i want to do,
> >> limited only by whether it's physically possible to accomplish,
> >> just in case it's the last chance.
> >>
> >> VERY happy with result.
> >Niels:
> >And you acctualy survived that?
> klaatu
> <whips out stethoscope, puts it to chest, listens intently>:
> ja, i think so ...
> either that's a heart-beat or there's a wood-pecker nearby...
Niels:
I think it's the wood-pecker.
> >Niels:
> >mean.. how many lives do you have? a million?
> klaatu:
> don't know,
> but used up so many doing stupid stuff
> i reckon it's about time to start using some sense.
> almost drowned once as well.
Niels:
Get a grip on yourself! Do you really think you have a endless life?
> >> >> klaatu:
> >> >> i've got a neighbor likes to play Real War for hours and hours.
> >> >> He's just turned six, and getting pretty good;
> >> >> wonder what he'll be like later?
> >> >Niels:
> >> >Like a far to small-minded computer nerd.
> >> klaatu:
> >> i dunno - he's not just into computers and he's tireless playing.
> >> was with him and his 4-yo sister
> >> climbing around one of those play-sets at McDonald's
> >> which are made of bright plastic tubing
> >> and look like a giant Habitrail for hamsters.
> >>
> >> seven hours, twenty-five minutes by the watch,
> >> continuous motion
> >> without holding still more than 30 seconds during that time.
> >>
> >> somehow i think neither one are gonna become
> >> average couch-potato/computer nerds.
> >Niels:
> >Just keep them sporting around...
> >the average youth still is far to fat!
> klaatu:
> if it isn't one thing, it's another -
> people are always telling me i should
> "get some meat on those bones"
> even tho i'm MUCH heavier than before;
> now almost 60 kg at 168 cm tall.
I'm like 67Kg and 180 tall, so it could be worse. But every kilo that comes
on too much, has to go agian, so watch out with it!
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >See ya
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >Niels
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> toodles,
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> k
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >Greetings,
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> >Niels
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> Salutations,
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >> k
> >> >> >> >> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >> >> >> >> ><waves>
> >> >> >> >> >> >> klaatu:
> >> >> >> >> >> >> <launches fireworks>
> >> >> >> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >> >> >> >Ooohh! aaahhh! Beautifull!
> >> >> >> >> >> <Master of Ceremonies gets jealous>:
> >> >> >> >> >> And NOW, ladies and gentlemen ....
> >> >> >> >> >> for ONE night only ...
> >> >> >> >> >> on stage ....
> >> >> >> >> >> the HYdrogen-Bomb !
> >> >> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >> >> ><crowd goes wild>
> >> >> >> >> ><female teenagers start screaming>
> >> >> >> >> <all life on Terra goes incandescent,
> >> >> >> >> then curls sinuously up into orange sky as smoke>
> >> >> >> >>
> >> >> >> >> <Prokaryotes gather to discuss>:
> >> >> >> >> Well guys, back to the drawing-board ....
> >> >> >> >Niels:
> >> >> >> ><Cinema movie watchers go wild as movie ends> ;-)
> >> >> >> <fade to black>
> >> >> >> <Supreme Being/Master of Ceremonies speaks>:
> >> >> >> Thank you for attending our featured Universe ...
> >> >> >> and now for a cartoon ....
> >> >> >.....We will start....
> >> >> >
> >> >> ><lookes puzzled> Tom & Jerry!
> >> >> <crowd goes wild>
> >> ><Supreme Being/Master of Ceremonies lookes puzzled>
> >> >
> >> >I don't like Tom & Jerry at all!
> >> Tom & Jerry:
> >> yah?
> >> Well, okay for YOU, then -
> >> we're gonna go start our OWN universe,
> >> so THERE - nyaah ! ....
> >Niels:
> >Your own universe... could I desingn that all by myself?
> Shop-Assistant:
> of course - we've got starter-kits at reasonable prices
> with tutorial and Life Science assembly-manual on DVD -
>
> get it today, and soon teachers will be writing of you:
> "Makes friends easily . . . . "
Niels:
And how much do they cost? Like a million U.S. dollars?
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