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From: elag <elag@cloud9.net>
Newsgroups: alt.surrealism
Subject: Re: site for sore feet
Date: Sun, 14 Sep 2003 23:25:13 -0400
Organization: Plus ca change plus c'est la meme chose
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Paul Heslop wrote:
>
> elag wrote:
> >
>
> > > > The American dream makes me gag... its all about conspicuous consumption
> > > > and keeping up appearances. I dream about sleeping late, sowing dissent
> > > > and sculpting in the woods... I may be deported.
> > >
> > > :O) Yeah, you're obviously a commie pinko and need to get out, shoot
> > > some deer and tie them to your cadilac!
> >
> > Used Cadillacs make excellent homes for rodents.
>
> So do new ones :O)
But the best place for rodents to live is in the Houses of Parliament or
Congress or what have you. They are very cozy and well lined w/
colorful bits of "paper".
> >
> > I have eaten deer, but I'd hate to have to shoot one unless I was
> > starving. Once when I was hiking in the snow I found a deer lying by
> > the side of the road with the top of its head sawn off (for the
> > antlers). Its blank stare was one of the most pathetic things I've ever
> > seen. It really made me angry that the hunters didn't even eat the meat
> > and instead chose to dump the body like garbage all for the sake of
> > their bloody "trophy". The most evolved species...
>
> Yep, that's the real gauling thing. Food is one thing. Actually I reckon
> if it came to the push I couldn't even kill a lettuce for food.
You could lick the dew from its leaves, but you wouldn't last long that
way. You need a food replicator.
>
> > > > There is one in Florida as well. The only place in Fla. that interests
> > > > me is the Everglades. Did you ever taste Alligator... tastes just like crocodile.
> > >
> > > :O) Yum. We don't get a lot of alligators... or even crocs, in
> > > Geordieland.
> >
> > You really ought to check the sewers though...
> >
> > You've probably heard the urban legend of gators in the NYC sewers?
>
> Certainly, here it would be wild gerbils.
Do the wild gerbils roam free on the High Street or are they only
roamin' in the gloamin'?
> >
> > > I've probably tasted cat, but not deliberately.
> >
> > It's only fair since they'd probably eat you if they could.
>
> erk! My daughter bought two rats for the kids, which they loved, but
> something happened to one, she started getting weak and wobbly. Vet said
> it was some ear thing they are prone to. Then the other day she came
> downstairs with the youngest child and when they went to feed the rats
> she noticed some strange looking things scattered round the cage, the
> the little one made a disgusted noise and she realised she was looking
> at something she described as being like a cartoon chicken's ribcage
> after a feast. The fit rat had either killed and eaten or had feasted on
> after death, the ill rat!
A very nice morality play on overpopulation. We can learn much from the
noble rat.
What were the names of your lil' rodent friends?
>
> > > Oh well, there's the Munster thing for me :O) I'm not sure I have met
> > > any 'real' celebs. Eddie Kidd (A kind of English Evel Kneivel) once
> > > opened a shopping precinct nearby and we popped in. There was Eddie
> > > doing autographs and my wife walked over and picked up some stickers and
> > > stuff for the kids, ignoring Eddie, who was grinning and brandishing his
> > > pen. She couldn't understand why I was chuckling til I explained she
> > > just snubbed the star of the show. "Never heard of the bloke!" was her
> > > response.
> >
> > Yeah, that's usually how excited I get when a celebrity is spotted.
> >
> > "Hey, that guy is on TV!"
> >
> > "Yeah, that must be why I have the desire to mute him."
> >
> > I might be interested if I saw... Sergio Aragones (MAD cartoonist) or
> > Suu Kyii (leader of the nonviolent movement for human rights and
> > democracy in Burma [Myanmar]) but I doubt I'd go over and pester them.
>
> Yes, there are odd people, mainly people who create, writers probably,
> who I would love to see... and David Bowie. I am an ardent U2 fan but
> somehow meeting Bono I think would be like meeting a deranged but very
> rich child.
> >
>
> > > Certainly. When I wanted to be a writer, as a youth, I used to throw
> > > stuff down which was basically my life. Only problem is of course I used
> > > real names and the people who crossed me generally died a horrible death
> > > :O)
> >
> > So, all you really have to do is change the names. I think fishy names
> > like Mr. Shark, Miss Bait or Mrs. Chum would work nicely.
> >
>
> > >
> > > It doesn't mention the internet! :O))
> >
> > Well there is a ref to a net in there somewheres. Have a bit of
> > sympathy for those ancient types... when they wanted to surf the web,
> > half the time they ended up with spider bites and the rest of the time
> > they were cold and wet due to the lack of surfboards.
>
> They're running some sweet adds atm, some bug eyed geeky nerds working
> at their computers, getting all excited about a screen full of digits
> and one of them says "If only we could send this data... maybe through
> telephone lines... a sort of 'inter network!"
The "sneaker net" first last and always.
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