Re: Dear Sir Victor |
EasyNews, UseNet made Ea .. |
HMS Victor Victorian (victorvictorian@hushunomail.com) |
2012/02/19 15:15 |
On 18 Feb 2012 20:26:02 -0600, "Group_Troll"
<GroupTroll@Pissed.Off.nl> wrote:
>FROM: HMS Victor Victorian <victorvictorian@hushunomail.com>
>
>> On 17 Feb 2012 11:35:00 -0600, "Group_Troll"
>> <GroupTroll@Pissed.Off.nl> wrote:
>>
>>>It has come to my attention of the danger in these groups.
>>>
>>>Therefore I can no longer troll you unless we go to PGP and exchange
>>>keys.
>>>Then only you will know when I troll you alone, and the same for other
>>>humans I troll in this group.
>>>
>>>Also give consideration that I should troll you over in the secret group
>>>and not here.
>>>
>>>Plus, we need to exchange our Mother's maiden names and our bank account
>>>numbers. I have a very dear troll uncle who lives in Nigeria and needs
>>>help getting his money out of that country. he is willing to give you
>>>some of that money for helping him. As I do not have a human ID, I am
>>>unable to set up a secret Swiss bank account for him. I do so love my
>>>uncle and I do hope you are willing to help for your share of that money.
>>
>>
>> My Dearest Friend GroupTroll,
>>
>> Thank you so very much for your insightful analysis of our precarious
>> situation in to-day's world. I completely agree with your suggestions
>> and am fully prepared to comply with them totally ... although there
>> are a few drawbacks to note.
>>
>> First, if I send you my keys, how shall I gain access to the flat? Not
>> to mention the Citron! I suppose I might make duplicates ... tho' a
>> fat lot of good they'll do you.
>
>Dear Sir Victor, thank you for your prompt reply. Alias! The problems you
>mention I never gave thought to.
>You live in a flat? Oh dear! I live in a round tree. So you and I could
>never fit in either. As for duplicates - NO! No! as duplcates may contain
>virus or trojans that would jam the lock.
>
Yes, in the boot of my Citroen.
And yes, Trojans do not go well with Troy.
.>>
>> And if I did, how might I send them PGP? What is PGP, anyway? Is it
>> an international service? PanGlobalPostal, for example? Is it
>> costly? Wouldn't Federal Express be better?
>
>PGP is a troll service over 200 years old! Pretty Good Postal aka PGP.
>It ia a very pretty delivery service, and a good one too! They wrap your
>packages for you in plain brown paper and deliver them in secret.
>Yes! It does cost a hoof and sometimes a leg. That's why so many trolls
>walk on artificial legs.
>
>>
>> The group to which you refer is secret. I haven't a clue as to what
>> it might be.
>
>DRAT! I was hoping you could tell me.
>
>>
>> My mother was never a maid ... a housewife yes ... a maid, no. In
>> either case, she'd have used the same name.
>
>er....I see. So humans do it one way and trolls the other.
>My mother was also made; made to do this, made to do that, and she kept her
>same name.
Well, I should confess that my mother was made as well ... hence me.
>
>>
>> I have no need for bank accounts, and thus do not have one, making all
>> my purchases for my meager needs by rechargeable debit cards, paid for
>> with a mattress full of money, upon which I sleep nightly. Wonderful
>> security!
>
>OH! a bed full of money! OOoooooooo! my eyes are rolling back in my head
>dreaming of soh ewjej EL ELpELP i cannt cee myiiiis my iiyes OH! Now I can
>see again. WOW! Daddy all ways told never dream of human wealth.
>
>>
>> As for your rich uncle ... rich uncles are not to be trusted in the
>> least, either from Nigeria or Nottingham. I had one. Didn't leave me
>> a bob.
>
>Granted I have never met my rich uncle from Nigeria but he wrote me such an
>emotional letter, and he knows all about me and my family and my dreadful
>need for money - and he said he LOVED me! And he wants to bring ALL his
>money and ALL his extended family to America via England, and he just
>needed a little help - about 5000 pounds in cash. Then when you meet him at
>the tramp steamer, you would get your money back and more!
>But so be it. I'll see if he can go to Greece first.
>
Pounds? The monetary or weight unit? If the latter, I might be able
to get that amount in pence, but not without assurances of better
return! As for Greece, I'm afraid they've sold it to China to make
ends meet.
>>
>> Other than that, let's have a go, shall we?
>
>"a go"? does that mean we each drink a beer or glass of wine or tea at 2?
>You do know that we trolls are unable to hold a glass or cup like you
>humans do.
>Perhaps you would share my 5 day old pot of dead goat stew?
>
Thank you for the gracious offer ... but no.
>>
>> Sincerely and with Fondest Affection,
>> V
>> God Save the Queen.
>> God Bless the Prince of Wales.
>> God Preserve the Windsors.
>> Rule Britannia!
>>
|
|
|