Solomon's Private File #167
These stories about Stephen and Solomon take place starting in
1950's. Stephen wrote about his life in letters to a penpal, and then
in a secure blog, in case he lost his memory again, in the master
computer in his school for gifted students, which he started attending
in 2016 in a new incarnation, until his death. Now his son Solomon is
attending the same school, and is writing in his own secure blog for
his future incarnations.
All characters are fictitious, even if some of them might have names
that belong to some actual people, or act like people we know.
Solomon is 21 in this story, in the Fall of 2047.
Solomon's Private File #167 "Rumble in Personnel"
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Word got out about my meeting with the Pope and Cardinals. I was
asked to comment. I said, "I've met with a lot of clergy, many times. I
view those situations as privileged, legal and religious, private
communications, and therefore not for public discussions, even that we
met. If those I met with, to whom I might have said that it wasn't
private, desire to make it public, that is their choice." That was
treated as minor news, and didn't draw useful comments.
I was with a client in my office at the Bureau when I made my phone
ring. I answered it, and then hung up I said to the client, "Please
take your file and ask the receptionist to assign you to another
interviewer. I've been called away." I walked very fast to personal,
where a big brawl was going on between some civilians, and between them
and some guards. I made my voice very big, and said, "WHAT IS GOING ON
HERE?" It was like thunder, and it froze them all in their tracks. One
of the civilians had taken a guard's weapon. Very fast, I was at that
man's side, and I ripped the gun out of his hand. I gave it back to the
guard, and said, "Tie it to your wrist, maybe?" He was embarrassed. Two
other guards had to laugh. The tension in the room ebbed a little. I
said, "Harry, help her." The guard picked up a woman and helped her to
a chair. I said, "Now all tell me what happened. Yes, you can all speak
at once. Now!"
They did. I said to one civilian, "Sir, you have lied. Don't do that
again." He said, "I didn't lie!" I said, "I'm the head of the
Psychological Assessment Department. I know when I'm being lied to. Lie
again, and you will regret it. Why did you strike this man?" He said,
"I didn't!" I said, "Do you know what this is? It's on now." He
obviously did, and said, "Alright, I did it. I was angry." I waited. I
said, "Insufficient justification. I'm angry now, but I'm not
flattening you. Why did you hit him?" He said, "But that was the
reason!" I said, "Do you hit everybody you see, when you're angry?" He
said, "I see what you mean. I don't. He butted in front of me in line."
I looked at one of the workers there, and she said, "He was already in
process. I asked him to give me his corrected questionnaire. He wasn't
in line." I said to the angry man, "Was that good justification to
attack him from behind without warning?" He looked conflicted, glancing
at the lie detector. He sighed and said, "No, it wasn't." I said, "You
were selfish and arrogant. Do you agree?" He said, "No!" I said, "All
others present. Do you agree with my assessment?" They all indicated
they did. I said to him, "Now?" He said, "No."
I said to him, "You have committed armed assault and battery, and
caused a violent disturbance and physical mayhem in a Federal Security
Zone. Serious felonies. Do you need a lengthy stay in a high security
federal prison to cause you to face your problems?" He looked very
afraid. He gulped and said, "I didn't know." Red flash. I said,
"Obviously, you did. You just didn't care. More evidence of your
selfishness and arrogance. YOU PUT PEOPLE'S LIVES IN DANGER WITH YOUR
ACTIONS! And you still don't care." I said to one of the responding
agents, "Well, I tried. He's yours now. I think he's going to care
pretty soon." He nodded. He and another went to cuff the man, who
resisted. That didn't last long. I gave the agent a memory card of what
happened. They dragged him out.
I said to all, "Questions?" A sec said, "You tried to get him to
admit to his faults. If he had, would his punishment have been less?" I
said, "Yes. We all make mistakes. Not admitting to them, and what
caused them, means they will happen again. Being locked up, tends to
reduce that happening in normal society. If he had really believed he
was at fault, I would have recommended a light punishment. As he is
now, that wouldn't motivate him to change." One asked, "How did you
know what was happening?" I said, "Er, ever hear of the telephone?"
Chuckles. The head of Personnel said, "I sure have! Very useful!" More
chuckles. One asked her, "Why did you call Dr. Nimbol, instead of
asking for more security?" She said, "More security wouldn't fit in
here. A loose gun in a sardine packed room, somebody's going to have
some extra holes. I've seen Dr. Nimbol in action. If any one person not
already here could help, I knew he could." The guards nodded in
agreement.
I said to the civilians, "What happens here in this Federal Security
Zone is not for the public to know. Do you all understand?" They did. I
said, "Please wait for the agents to take your statements. If you might
have a small desire to please me, you can include some puns in it." I
smiled to their chuckles. I said to the attacked man, indicating one of
the guards, "To the infirmary with you. No, toughing it out isn't an
option. Regs." I said similar things to the previously downed woman.
They nodded, and they went with the indicated guard. I took the lie
detector with me, and went with the supervisor into her office. I could
hear the office manager in the outer offices calling them back to work.
I said to the supervisor, "This not lying thing is awkward." She
grinned and said, "Sure is! I think I would have called you, a little
later. Glad you came before that." I said, "I think some changes are in
order. Guards should have restricted fire guns. Close there." She said,
"You wouldn't have let it fire." I said, "True, but we don't want that
noticed." She said, "Do we need a panic button?" I ported a gigantic
one to her desk, and she laughed.
I told the Director what happened, and about my idea for the guns. He
said, "Could you make some for us?" I said, "No, against principle.
However, I can evaluate what's already made, and make suggestions to
enhance safety." He said, "We have samples of all models in the armory.
Any of them any good?" I told him which model was best for which
purpose, and said, "Master key system should be changed. Guards and
agents need to be trained, if their weapon is taken, not to reach for
it without turning off their key, which will have to have that feature
added. Here are the proposed specs." He said, "I'll put this in the
works. So you don't just watch the entrance." I said, "Various levels
of watch in different places, and I monitor all civilian visitors. Even
if I hadn't, the noise would have alerted me. Very sensitive hearing."
He said, "You do this in other countries. Afghanistan?" I said, "We
only do assessment and approvals if invited to. They asked, and we did
a trial run. Too many rejections. Most applicants placed their
religious values over their duties. That might not have been as much of
a problem as you might think, but those values were easily changed,
depending on the cleric of the day. And then there are family and
tribal loyalties and vendettas, which they place much higher than
national. Those problems plague all third world Islamic countries.
Which is why police being trained by the West isn't working. We don't
do approvals in any of them. Just not compatible."
A man walked into my office for evaluation. He said, "You ripped that
gun right out of his hand! I never saw anybody move that fast in my
life." I said, "Who's doing the evaluating here?" We traded smiles. We
did the tests. Then I said, "Taking a gun out of a man's hand is easier
than it looks, and also harder, if you don't want a finger with it. A
double action revolver won't fire if you have a firm grip on the
cylinder, or a finger in front of a cocked external hammer. That last,
same for an automatic, and some of them won't fire if the slide is
pushed back a little. A person's grip on a gun is more loose than
people assume, or the trigger would be pulled by accident. If you twist
the gun toward the fingers, butt against the thumb, the weakest part of
the grip, and barrel down, not forward, the natural response in reflex
is to let go. Do it fast, works best." He said, "Wow! Even a shrink is
an expert on guns, here." I said, "We're not a country club. If you're
very familiar with the model gun the perp has, you can engage the
safety while you're grabbing it." He said, "They teach that here?" I
said, "I don't know. One of my hobbies is martial arts. Any true
martial artist in these modern times should know about all the kinds of
weapons he might have to deal with." He left, approved, saying wow
under his breath a lot.
A woman walked in. I said, "I'm glad you're alright." She said with a
smile, "So am I. Martial arts?" I said, "One of my hobbies." She
nodded. We did the tests. I said, "Your brown belt in Judo will be
useful." She said, "I thought a hard style would be preferred." I said,
"We don't want our people smashing perps, but controlling them. Hard
stylists often cause more problems than they're worth at the Academy.
When, er, if you go there, you might hear about some of that." She
grinned widely and said, "I'll possibly look forward to it." Highly
recommended.
A woman came in, I said, after looking at her file, "A physicist! How
would that subject be useful to the Bureau?" She said, "Ballistics, and
any scene movement interpretation, including crimes involving
aircraft." I said, "Yes. Good. What do you think of Stephen's
description of dark matter?" She laughed loudly. I said, "Well, that
tells me." Chuckles. We did the tests. She said, "Why the question
about dark matter?" I said, "Important work. Tension on the job. Sense
of humor helps not just you." She said, "I suspected. Thanks." I said,
"Doctoral subject?" We discussed it. She said, "I didn't expect this!"
I said, "Double major. Need a review, let me know." She said, "I might.
Thank you!" Highly recommended.
A man came in. I looked at his file. Executive Assistant. Mental
examination showed severe dishonesty. We did the tests. I said, "You
worked for Gendyne. Tell me about the job." I was typing on the
computer keyboard while he was talking. I said, "So, why do you want to
work for us?" He said, "I think it will be more interesting." I said,
"Could be. Do you know what we do?" He said, "You investigate crimes."
I said, "True. We also investigate people for government security
clearances. That means our people have to be investigated first." He
was looking very nervous. I said, "Gendyne is a major government
contractor. That means I have full access to their files, even
including accounting and payroll. You worked for the head of Personnel.
Hmm, this is interesting." I pressed the intercom button for the code
for a criminal to be taken away, where he couldn't see. I said,
"Somehow, you were paid more than he was. Please explain how that
happened." He said, really squirming, "I don't know. It must be a
mistake." I said, "That remains to be seen. Some job applicants there
complained about their files being lost. Oh, here's something very
interesting. Three people were hired, but never showed up for work, and
their bosses never knew they should have, and they're still being paid.
To your bank account. Creative! Skillfully done! We could use that kind
of expertise here." He looked very strange.
I said, "You had it made. So, why the switch?" He said, "It was too
easy?" I said, "I can understand that. What's the good of doing it
without the thrill of danger? Challenge!" He said, "Er, yes, that's
true." I said, "Do you know we hire hackers?" He said, "I heard about
that. What I did could be useful here like that?" The guards came in. I
said, "Unfortunately, not with you. You're facing serious criminal
charges." I said to the Special Agents, "Embezzlement, fraud, false
testimony, bank fraud, tax evasion, and seriously interfering with a
key government defense contractor. Maybe even treason. Here's what I've
uncovered so far." I gave them a memory card. I said to the perp,
"Thank you. We really like criminals to come to us of their own will.
Very convenient. Have a bad day." The agents were chuckling while they
took him to a perp room.
A woman came in. She said, "I heard some of that, here and in
personnel. Do you often get criminals here?" I said, "The stupid ones,
sometimes. One even made himself of our jurisdiction by crossing state
lines to come here to apply. Even his kidnapped boy thought that was
stupid when we told him." She said, "Wow!" I said, "Definitely not what
the perp was saying." Chuckles. She said, "Ever had violence here?" I
said, "Oh yes! You weren't thinking of physically exploring that issue
yourself?" She said, "Oh God, no!" I said, "Good. Masters in Police
Science. Crime scene?" She said, "Yes. I like field work." I said, "I
don't see transcripts here. What have you got in pathology?" She sighed
and said, "I was hoping you wouldn't ask. A lot." I said, "We would
find out. Forget where you are?" She said, "Oh!" I said, "Don't worry
too much. Happens a lot." We did the tests. I said, "I can approve you
for the lab, which has priority. What can you use to convince me I
should approve you for the field? Would have to be good." She said, "A
lot of applicants for the field ahead of me?" I said, "Thousands." She
said, "Expert on the pistol. And er, I can throw knives well. A hobby."
I said, "Let me guess; slingshot, too?" She said in surprise, "Yes! How
did you know?" I said, "Classic country tomboy. Looking good for you,
but now we get to have some fun. Please come with me." We went to the
office manager, and I said, "We're going to the range and then the gym.
No, don't look like that! Not martial arts this time." She looked
embarrassed. The applicant was amused.
On the way to the range, she said, "You must be SOME expert, judging
by that look." I said, "Er, yes. Still, the grapevine will have
preceded us. I may have to show some annoyance just to get in." She
grinned. I said to her, "A little sympathy wouldn't hurt your chances."
She said, "Really?" I sighed and said, "Er, no." She said, "I thought
so. They wouldn't have respected you as they do if you were that kind
of man." I said, "Even applicants are embarrassing me now. What has
this world come to!" She laughed. I was right. There was a crowd there.
I said to them, "Don't you have real work to do?" I said to the
applicant, "Looks as if we can't hire you, if we have so many people,
there isn't enough work for them. Hmm, I don't want to have to look
mean twice in one day. Think you can do it for me?" She laughed. I
said, "That sure didn't work."
I checked out a standard service pistol, and a clip and some ammo.
And ear protectors and glasses for us. I said, "Two rounds to
familiarize yourself with the weapon." She fired those two, and did
well. I said, "Now, when I say go, take it from the table and fire.
Target is center head. Two shot burst. Speed counts. Ready? Hands off.
Go!" She did, and the holes were right next to each other. I said to
the Range Master, "Judgement?" He said, "Full expert. Applicant?" I
said, "Yes. More tests, though. Knife thrower. I want to see that." He
said, "Gym." We went. I said to the gym manager, "Can do knife throwing
here?" He said, "I'll check." I said to the applicant, "Wait here." I
went with the manager into the back room. When we were alone, he said,
"I don't have that equipment here. You'll provide?" I said, "You knew
that. That's why I'm in here with you. It's sure not for your looks!"
He had to laugh.
Suddenly, there was a wooden target, and I had an assortment of
knives and axes in my hands. We went out to the gym proper, and he set
up the target against a wall, and a little folding table. I put the
weapons on the table. I bowed to the applicant, and motioned to the
table. She took the hint, and a knife, and took a stance, and threw it.
Close to the bull's eye. I said, "I know you can do the axe." She
smiled at me and said, "Sure. Chopping wood is SO boring. Beating my
brothers at this, wasn't." I smiled back. She WAS good. I said, "Ever
do it with your eyes closed?" She said, as if in a challenge, "Have
YOU, mister shrink?" I gestured to the crowd, and they nodded and said,
"Yes he has." She said, "Oops!" Laughter. I said, "You can do it
easily, with some added confidence. You know where the target is.
You've already thrown successfully from this position. You just need to
repeat your physical memory of what you did before. You don't really
need your eyes for that." She nodded, and tried it, to success. Opening
her eyes, she said, "Wow!" I said, "Qualifies. Works with firearms,
too. One more thing. Do it on command." She nodded, and took up a
knife, and closed her eyes. I said, "Go!" Success.
I said, "Evaluation results; good skills, and trainable." The manager
said, "I concur!" I said to her, "You didn't just compete in this with
your brothers. You competed in everything. You can wrestle. How about
punching?" We went to the heavy bag, and she pounded it. I said, "If it
could speak, we'd be hearing a whole lot of ouches." She said, "Funny.
What happened to that one?" Somebody said, "It would have screamed
bloody murder, when Dr. Nimbol put his arm through it." She said, "Let
me guess. Testing another applicant?" I said, "Ah, a little." Chuckles.
She said to them, "Who wants to see what he can do with knives?" They
all did, and showed it. I said to her, "Trust me?" She said,
"Absolutely not! I will NOT be a circus target for you!" I said to the
manager, "The dummy in the storage room?" He went to get it, and he
hung it in front of the target. I said, "Another folding table." He ran
to get it. I had a table on each side of me, with the knives arranged
for easy grabbing in groups. I said, "I'll have my eyes closed for
this." I did that, and grabbed two knives in each hand, and threw them
in a blur, and then another double handful. I opened my eyes. The
knives were outlining the dummy, very closely. I said to her, "Get the
point?" Some groans. I took four of the knives and tossed them in
order, spinning them madly. Then I picked them out of the air by the
handles one by one, and tossed them spinning again, juggling them. Then
I stopped, catching them. I said, "I kind of like knives. Swords, too."
Some said, "He's really good with swords!"
I said, "Enough! We're finished here." I said to a woman in the
crowd, "What are you doing here?" She said, "I just had to see!" I
said, "Well, this time it's convenient. The file on my desk. I need it
in personal with me." She nodded and ran off. I said, "I didn't know
she was so athletic." Chuckles. The applicant and I went to Personnel.
I asked to see the supervisor. The file was brought in by my
embarrassed sec. I tried not to grin, which she noticed. I said to the
supervisor, "We want her." I told her why, the whole story. She said,
"I agree. Go away now." We all grinned at each other. I shook hands
with the applicant, and left. Ivanna said in my mind, "That was
entertaining. Do it for that?" I said, "A little, yes. Mostly to give
the applicant a reason for me to push her through with what she wanted.
I couldn't say it was because I had examined her mind." She said, "But
you didn't have to show off." I said, "Actually, I did. They came to
see me. Wouldn't be good to disappoint them. The show must go on, kind
of thing. Not nice to leave an audience frustrated." She sighed, and
said, "I didn't think of that. Only you would. I can't understand how
you can be so thoughtful, even with the little things." I said, "Well,
that's not MY problem." We exchanged rude noises and laughter, and a
lot of love.
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Grant
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