| Re: ...this mortal coil |
Posted via Supernews, ht .. |
| Parry (parry@perfectOMITmail.com) |
2004/01/25 00:05 |
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From: Parry <parry@perfectOMITmail.com>
Newsgroups: alt.surrealism
Subject: Re: ...this mortal coil
Date: Sun, 25 Jan 2004 02:05:20 -0500
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elag wrote:
>
> Parry wrote:
> >
> > elag wrote:
> > >
> > > Corpse at busy intersection in Osaka, Japan ignored for two months
> >
> > A pointy yang to your pointed yin...
> >
> > Rockers Eulogize Millionaire Mulheren
> >
> ....
>
> I'd like to leave some instructions for a whimsical and irreligious
> funeral, but I have my doubts as to whether my wishes would really be
> carried out.
>
> I guess that after they shovel all my artwork, scripts and films into a
> landfill, some doddering cat-lick harp polisher will mumble some
> religious doggerel over my rotting corpse, and everyone will be
> satisfied that solemn dignity has been maintained...
>
> My ideas run more along the lines of a New Orleans Jazz band... all the
> dandelion wine you can drink... and maybe a loop of Fatty Arbucke and
> Mable Normand shorts playing on the side of my pine box... everyone
> would be issued a "sharpie" so they could write amusing limericks on the
> sky blue MuMu in which I wish to be buried... It goes w/o saying that I
> will carve my own tombstone... my epitaph might be:
>
> "If you are a frog do not try to sing like a nightingale. Croak and
>
> but that would take an awful long time to carve!
No funeral for me. Pull the plug, burn the body. Now, yet another news
clipping...
Friday January 09, 2004
By Brian Thevenot Staff writer
On Monday, the parents of Finley Christopher Farley, 45, firmed up
arrangements for his funeral after hearing of his death from the Orleans
Parish coroner's office.
Eugene and Marion Farley chose a funeral home in the tiny rural town of
Trinity, Ala., just outside their hometown of Decatur. The director
there contracted with a New Orleans funeral home to embalm the body and
ship it home.
The parents placed an obituary Tuesday in the Decatur Daily without
saying how he met his end. The obit noted he died Jan. 3 and that his
visitation would be held Wednesday night, followed by burial Thursday.
They had thought it odd that the coroner's office wouldn't tell them how
their son died, just that his body was found in a New Orleans hotel
room.
Nor did the coroner tell them, apparently, that the body had bright red
hair, a red beard and looked as much as 15 years younger than their
brown-haired, middle-age son -- or they might have realized sooner that
the dead body wasn't his.
Turns out Farley remains very much alive, though apparently not all
together well.
As the afternoon newspaper in Decatur carrying his obituary rolled off
the press, Farley sat in an Orleans Parish Prison cell, likely dealing
with the sort of headache that comes the morning after one gets arrested
on charges of crack cocaine possession and public drunkenness. New
Orleans police picked up Farley at 1:40 a.m. Monday in the 400 block of
Dauphine Street in the French Quarter, authorities said.
Farley remained in jail Thursday, as mourners showed up to his funeral
more than 400 miles away, only to be told the dearly departed had not
actually departed.
[...]
Exactly how his name got connected with another man's cadaver remains a
mystery, as does the identity of the dead man. A manager for the New
Orleans funeral home that handled the body said it came tagged with
Farley's name from the Orleans Parish coroner. Coroner Frank Minyard and
his investigator John Gagliano didn't respond to repeated calls seeking
comment. A secretary in Minyard's office said she didn't think the
mix-up "should be publicized."
[...]
"It's been a big mess here," funeral director Michael Coffee said. "We
had people showing up for the visitation and then the funeral today, and
we had to tell them the guy's still alive."
To say nothing of what Farley's parents have endured. Eugene Farley is
71; Marion is 67.
"They went five or six days thinking their son was dead," Coffee said.
"They really had a hard time."
On the bright side of Farley's crack bust, it was his arrest that
sparked the chain of events that finally confirmed to his grieving
parents that he was still alive. On Tuesday morning, the day after he
was booked, a defense lawyer trawling for clients picked up Farley's
name from a list at the jail, and mailed him a letter offering to
represent him, Coffee said. His parents got the letter Wednesday and
called the lawyer, who told them their son was alive and in jail.
Coffee said he subsequently spoke to a representative of the coroner's
office, who said the dead man was discovered with Farley's
identification in a hotel room rented by Farley. The office didn't say
how the man died, Coffee said, or why the coroner's office didn't catch
the discrepancy in age and appearance between Farley and the mystery
corpse.
[...]
Coffee had figured it was just a big-city thing.
"This is very unusual. We live in tiny little town," Coffee said.
Trinity has a population of about 1,800. "I don't know if this happens
all the time in New Orleans or what."
http://www.nola.com/news/t-p/frontpage/index.ssf?/base/news-1/107363338119460.xml
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