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From: elag <elag@cloud9.net>
Newsgroups: alt.surrealism
Subject: Re: site for sore feet
Date: Fri, 19 Sep 2003 00:32:42 -0400
Organization: de mortuis nil nisi bonum
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Paul Heslop wrote:
>
> elag wrote:
> >
> > Paul Heslop wrote:
> > >
> > > elag wrote:
> > > >
> > >
> > > > > > The American dream makes me gag... its all about conspicuous consumption
> > > > > > and keeping up appearances. I dream about sleeping late, sowing dissent
> > > > > > and sculpting in the woods... I may be deported.
> > > > >
> > > > > :O) Yeah, you're obviously a commie pinko and need to get out, shoot
> > > > > some deer and tie them to your cadilac!
> > > >
> > > > Used Cadillacs make excellent homes for rodents.
> > >
> > > So do new ones :O)
> >
> > But the best place for rodents to live is in the Houses of Parliament or
> > Congress or what have you. They are very cozy and well lined w/
> > colorful bits of "paper".
>
> :O) Unless you're Swedish or Dutch. Two countries I always think of as
> being peaceful places and they murder their politicians. Maybe they're
> trying to tell us something?
It can happen anywhere. It only takes one sociopath to spoil a
socialist utopia. I'm sure they also have their share of corruption,
though I don't know much about their local politics.
> >
> > > >
> > > > I have eaten deer, but I'd hate to have to shoot one unless I was
> > > > starving. Once when I was hiking in the snow I found a deer lying by
> > > > the side of the road with the top of its head sawn off (for the
> > > > antlers). Its blank stare was one of the most pathetic things I've ever
> > > > seen. It really made me angry that the hunters didn't even eat the meat
> > > > and instead chose to dump the body like garbage all for the sake of
> > > > their bloody "trophy". The most evolved species...
> > >
> > > Yep, that's the real gauling thing. Food is one thing. Actually I reckon
> > > if it came to the push I couldn't even kill a lettuce for food.
> >
> > You could lick the dew from its leaves, but you wouldn't last long that
> > way. You need a food replicator.
>
> In Lettuce's case I need a self-chomping lettuce. It is one of the few
> foods I am unable to chew. One inch of lettuce will last me til next
> week.
S'okay, tapioca tastes better than lettuce anyway.
Get your teef out of the freezer!
> >
> > >
> > > > > > There is one in Florida as well. The only place in Fla. that interests
> > > > > > me is the Everglades. Did you ever taste Alligator... tastes just like crocodile.
> > > > >
> > > > > :O) Yum. We don't get a lot of alligators... or even crocs, in
> > > > > Geordieland.
> > > >
> > > > You really ought to check the sewers though...
> > > >
> > > > You've probably heard the urban legend of gators in the NYC sewers?
> > >
> > > Certainly, here it would be wild gerbils.
> >
> > Do the wild gerbils roam free on the High Street or are they only
> > roamin' in the gloamin'?
>
> They would be down the sewers, using old car tires to run along inside
> and terrorize vagrants.
That does sound kind of creepy.
> >
> > > >
> > > > > I've probably tasted cat, but not deliberately.
> > > >
> > > > It's only fair since they'd probably eat you if they could.
> > >
> > > erk! My daughter bought two rats for the kids, which they loved, but
> > > something happened to one, she started getting weak and wobbly. Vet said
> > > it was some ear thing they are prone to. Then the other day she came
> > > downstairs with the youngest child and when they went to feed the rats
> > > she noticed some strange looking things scattered round the cage, the
> > > the little one made a disgusted noise and she realised she was looking
> > > at something she described as being like a cartoon chicken's ribcage
> > > after a feast. The fit rat had either killed and eaten or had feasted on
> > > after death, the ill rat!
> >
> > A very nice morality play on overpopulation. We can learn much from the
> > noble rat.
> > What were the names of your lil' rodent friends?
>
> Maria and Maggie. Just the kind of names you would give cannibals. I
> thought they all had names like Hannibal.
Then there were those fine young lads David, Andy and Roland.
>
> > > > >
> > > > > It doesn't mention the internet! :O))
> > > >
> > > > Well there is a ref to a net in there somewheres. Have a bit of
> > > > sympathy for those ancient types... when they wanted to surf the web,
> > > > half the time they ended up with spider bites and the rest of the time
> > > > they were cold and wet due to the lack of surfboards.
> > >
> > > They're running some sweet adds atm, some bug eyed geeky nerds working
> > > at their computers, getting all excited about a screen full of digits
> > > and one of them says "If only we could send this data... maybe through
> > > telephone lines... a sort of 'inter network!"
> >
> > The "sneaker net" first last and always.
>
> I prefer the fishing net.
It'll get your computer wet.
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